Sunday, July 8, 2012

Vegas!

Right after the half marathon we headed to Las Vegas to have a blast night there and return to LA through Death Valley. 


Transportation

Five of us traveled in a small Hyundai Accent, which we named Squirrel.



1.3 liter engine (the smallest engine I've ever used in cars), no central electronic lock (= each door has to be opened and locked separately), 12-gallon gas tank, almost no electronics -- and a five-way cost split. All this was a real money saver for a long trip.


Squirrel, you will be forever remembered.


We went approximately through this route, going to Victorville to run, then headed to Hoover Dam, Las Vegas, and finally crossing Death Valley on our way back to Pasadena.

Iskan is waaay bigger than Squirrel.
In total, we put ~880 miles on the car in 2 days, from early Saturday morning to late Sunday night. Being a single driver for the whole road trip, I think I've completed a basic endurance driving challenge. Especially given how little I slept and how much I drank.

To Las Vegas

The way from Victorville to Las Vegas was pretty boring: mountains and desert terrain all over the place. I mean at first it was like "WOW!", and then "pfff whatever".

Driving to Vegas = this picture * 5 hours.

As the only driver, I had fun cursing Squirrel's limited horsepower: it couldn't go faster 60 mph uphill; and kicking SUVs' and sportcars' butt when going downhill.




I fully realized how disadvantageous the driver's position was when it was too late. The driver cannot sleep, hence it's an epic fail after a race. Also, front seats are more exposed to the sun, and there's not much you can do about it.

We had a lunch near the tallest thermometer in the US. It was showing 114F (= 45.5C) under direct sunlight. I wonder if I remembered the number correctly because it sounds like A LOT.

Oleg and a tall thermometer.
Still wondering which of them is essential to this photo.

Another generic "everyone in" photo.
And a random average American on the right.
At some point, of course, we entered Nevada.

Myself introducing Nevada, the state of losers.
Silver is not as good as gold (which enjoys the first place),
but still better than bronze (which is glad to have made it to top 3).
Sucks to be you, silver.

 

Hoover Dam

The USSR was known for building a lot of huge stuff. Legacy buildings and monuments of enormous size (and even greater uselessness) are still numerous in the ex-USSR countries. Looks like the States also participated in this relay run of retardedness -- they built Hoover Dam. The thing shakes usual borders of space perception. Naturally, it's impossible to convey this feeling through photos.

View from a bridge at the dam.
View from the dam at the dam.
View from the dam at the bridge (and obviously at Iskan).
Misha dreaming about diving in all that water.
Iskan and I dreaming about diving in all that water.

Five of us dreaming about diving in all that water.
In fact, the dam creates a lovely radioactive lake downstream.

Lake Mead.

A brief moment of strategic thinking.

We couldn't miss a chance to take a short swim in it. Engulfing our bodies in cool water was so invigorating that what is shown on a picture below happened.

0.2 sec to a big win by Iskan.


The dividing line between Nevada and Arizona goes in the middle of the dam. Whenever you cross the border, you travel 1 hour in time. I'm writing this paragraph just to motivate a picture for Arizona below, which is in turn needed for its Arizona-hating caption.

If a natural ancient crack in the earth is the biggest achievment of a whole state,
it sounds very depressing to me.

Las Vegas


The city of sin should actually be called the city of some-kinds-of-sin.

Sins appreciated and embraced at Vegas:
  • Adultery: oh yes, plenty
  • Greed: not that it's not present in all other America-powered places
  • Drug abuse: use, overuse, abuse - any kind of use is there
  • Prostitution: it's a fair business -- you get what you pay for, at least
  • Fornication: probably correlates with other items here
  • Homosexuality: not sure if it's considered a sin or a blessing: no women - no trouble
  • Fraud: all sorts, to any extent
Sins that are underrepresented:
  • Gluttony: where are my human-sized burgers?!
  • False witnessing: on the contrary, everyone seems to get overly honest in Vegas
  • Sorcery: not much unless you count how card dealers manage to win
  • Extreme anger: haven't seen anyone freaking out after dumping $100 bills one after one
  • Murder: enough resources for everyone => no killing
Sins not noticed in Vegas at all (too bad, my favorite ones):
  • Euthanasia
  • Terrorism
  • Genocide

So, Vegas is selective about sins. Don't go there unless you know for sure what sin is offered at what hourly rate!

Las Vegas changes its face with sunset, so there are two cities in one: the day version and the night one. 

The Day Vegas 

It's a second-class entertainment city at daytime, with a bunch of hotels with swimming pools, spas, roller coasters, and souvenir shops. As the city of Vegas is essentially in a desert, daytime temperatures wipe most people off streets.

Upon arrival.
Completely disoriented, myself in particular.

We stayed in Excalibur hotel that is devoted to and decorated in a medieval theme.
Looks better to me than another faceless glass-and-concrete hotel.
"Not too bad", said he.

Pools at Excalibur.

All interesting stuff happens, both at day and at night, inside hotels. A casino is often a central area of an hotel. Many hotels are thematically related to different cities. The one below mimics New York.

The Empire State Building, Vegas-style.

Breaking news: not unique New York!
Kangaroo meat at an Australian restaurant.

The Night Vegas

At night, Vegas is definitely the place to be at! From prostitutes offering themselves every 100 yards (apparently it's legal there) to folks openly smoking pot and offering heroin.

View at the least interesting part of Vegas at night.
Ivan in front of Paris (left) and Hollywood (right) hotels.
The main street of Vegas, the Strip.

The Strip.
The Paris hotel.
I couldn't walk past a mechanical bull ride: I never tried it before but seen a lot in shitty movies. Now I have a shitty movie of my own.



Overall, the bull ride followed a well-known pattern of my leisure time: get drunk, do X -> enjoy X.

Alas, the way it looks doesn't match how much I enjoyed the process.
Want to drive prostitutes around Vegas and solicit deals at traffic lights?
Here is the way to go: a pink pimp van (Kill Bill!).

An unidentified dark-matter object taking a picture.

Casino games are a big thing in Vegas, obviously. I think of them falling into 2 categories: table games (played with dealers at tables) and slots (played at machines like one below).

Money lost = 0.
We're happy.


Table games are kinda complicated: there are 10 types of poker, blackjack, and roulette -- and no rules posted/explained around. Tables are populated with nerds having their own jargon, looks, and sign language. To me it looked pretty much like Starcraft of WoW of the 20th century.

Money won = almost $2.
Iskan happy, we envious.
Slots games, at the same time, are much more fun: you can plan hundreds of games, all with different rules, from regular slots to varieties of poker and other card games I never heard about.

In any case, all games are naturally rigged against the player, with chances of winning very much below 50% (even if we assume fair random number generation). So successful gambling = manipulating bets and quitting at the right moment.

Surprisingly, if you quit at a positive balance, you start feeling like a loser and coward. On the other hand, losing not more than $100 makes you feel good, as in "doin' in the right way". I fail to find a reputable explanation to this phenomenon.

Money lost >> money won.
Oleg is ready to eject from this unfair planet.


Well, this is about as much as I can share publicly about the dark side of Vegas without getting this blog banned in search engines and social networks for, basically, nudity or substances propaganda (hopefully gambling doesn't count). In one sentence, there was not much of a night left when sleep won over us (but we regained control very soon).

To summarize, Vegas was good times. I'd love to go back there at some point again. To help this happen I put a video with pennies tossed into a fountain. Every view results in my chance of revisiting Vegas going up.


Death Valley

What I would never forgive myself for was not visiting Death Valley on our way back. Since I was the only driver, my vote overrode any amount of opposition from the other four guys.

Welcome to the wastes.
Again, photos don't really carry over the sense of emptiness you get from enormous lifeless areas.

On our way from Vegas to Death Valley.
Another lifeless desert view.
Dunes in the valley.

In the valley I was busy setting a personal best speed on 1.3 L engines. When we finally reached 100 mph on plain ground, Squirrel was shaking as if there were an earthquake, a hurricane, and an artillery barrage all at once. I'm still amazed it didn't fall apart.

What my friends saw for the whole trip.

What can I write about Death Valley? It's a huge waste with many curious geological forms in it. Too bad I'm not qualified enough in geology to truly appreciate it.

Welcoming everyone to Death Valley.

Chilling out.
Not understanding what kind of a picture can one take with such a background.

Most of the valley gets too hot during daytime for anything to grow there without heavy-duty care.

Not really sure what's going on.
Probably overheated or something.

Nevertheless, a mutant enormous cow can grow there. It was friendly to us, thankfully.

Venting Squirrel after eating krakow sausages.

It gets so hot in Death Valley that everyone wants to end their futile existence.

Iskander's suicide attempt.
Prevented by Iskander.
My individual suicide attempt.
Prevented by no cars going on this freeway for three minutes.
A mass suicide attempt.
Prevented by the awesomeness of life.
And krakow sausages.
There's the States' lowest point somewhere in Death Valley. We were running out of fuel, food, and the driver's ability to concentrate (on anything other than krakow sausages), so we didn't go there. -190 feet was sufficient for us.

Took me a while to place a camera on rocks.

We passed a dried-up salt lake on our way. Having taken this chance, we replenished our bodily sodium chloride reserves.


Me tasting the salt.

Add caption


Extra salt in my body makes me proud.
The dusk descended quickly and almost unexpectedly.

20 minutes to darkness.

We tried exploring a canyon under the moon light: it was an interesting kind of experience. It was more like a horror movie with people lagging behind and disappearing than a regular tourist walk.

The moon is bright, but it's hardly enough to see the valley's grandeur.

"Death Valley is THAT long."

Seeing Death Valley at night is an unusual experience that we enjoyed big time. No photography can help me describe it.

Driving in darkness with no cars in a 10-mile radius was fun for me; on the other hand, Iskan -- being responsible for the trip security -- didn't like it at all. The biggest challenge is to react to sharp turns quickly enough when visibility is limited to around 50 yards.

What we could see at night.

Ooops, here comes a turn.

During our whole ride through Death Valley, we often met a red mustang with two Italians on board. On that day their national soccer team lost in Euro 2012 finals; thus they were an easy prey. Our Squirrel kicked their red vanilla sweet ass at the end of the day.

The mustang with Italians.

We returned to Pasadena at around 3am on Monday. So the ride from Vegas to Pasadena took approximately 11 hours. Long story short: now I know why falling asleep while driving is no shit.

The end! Sorry, it's happy for this time again. Lessons learned:
  • Not all sins are equal, my dear sinner.
  • Small cars are not good with mountains, but you can let your fury loose at downhills. Don't try it at home.
  • Wild West still wild. 

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